Monthly Archives: March 2014

My Book Part Two

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Haaaiiii guuuyyyysssss! Here is part dos! Please leave your thoughts in the comments below!

 

Annie

Laying in bed burying myself under the blankets comforts me for a while but the smell of Dave still lingers on everything. Will I ever be able to escape him? Or at least the thought of him? Tears start to try and make their way out but I hold them in. I bury myself under the blankets even further as it gets hot and stuffy making it hard to catch a breath, but I like it that way. It’s no different then the feeling I get when I think of Dave. Of us and what we had. Since he’s left it’s like I can’t breathe and when I try to walk it feels impossible like my legs won’t let me move on. I still can’t comprehend how he can just throw it all away. How he can just throw us away. I can feel the tears start to swell up in my eyes again and this time I let them come pouring out.

Dave

Half way to Arkansas this trip couldn’t possibly feel any longer. Oh wait, yes it could and is! I can’t get the picture of her standing there yelling useless words to me off my mind. I know this is better for the both of us but I didn’t think it would hurt this much. Why does love have to make life so complicated? Everything was great until my feelings got in the way. I’m such an idiot for thinking I could be good enough for a woman like her. She deserves better and I hope she finds someone better. The on going war inside my head has me so distracted I am completely unaware that I am going 90 mph. I start slowing down but once it occurs to me that I’m on an open road, I gun it. Not caring if I get pulled over. Not caring about how bad my hands are shaking from.. fear? Not caring if I crash and don’t make it.  The thought of dying does scare me but as of right now, it seems like the best outcome to happen in my life. Without her I might as well be dead.

Johnny

Knocking on her door and calling her name I get no response which just increases my worry. I can’t stand waiting any longer and barge in hoping to see her there waiting for me but see her no where. Examaning the living room I see pictures of her and Dave scattered on the coffee table. I bend down to pick one up and hear foot steps approaching and decide I better not. She enters the door way to the living room wrapped up in a blanket, hair a mess, and puffy eyes. I can’t help but pull her into me and wrap her up in my arms. Caressing her hair and telling her it’s gonna be okay I can’t help but to smirk. The last time we got this close was when we were kids and I start going down memory lane in my head. Her sniffles bring me back and she holds me tighter so I give her a good squeeze and pull her away to look into her eyes. All I can see is pain.

My Book. :)

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Please leave any comments over anything. Please forgive misspelled words and incorrect punctuation. Anything you have to say is appreciated. And no, this is not all. There is more. WAY more.

Annie

The sound of my heart was pounding in my ears. I could feel the blood rushing to my face. Not because I was embarrased by proclaiming my love to him but because I was furious. After all those years I spent loving him. Waiting for him to realize he was the perfect one for me. He leaves. Leaves as if I was nothing to him. I’ll never forgive him for this. “I hope you never find peace and that old Chevy breaks down and leaves you stranded you coward!” I know he can’t hear me over the roar of the engine but it feels good to yell.

Dave

I can see her yelling up a storm in my rear view mirror.  I hope she doesn’t hate me. Oh, who am I kidding? She has every right to hate me. That woman loved me and cared for me better then anyone else ever could have and I pushed her away and drug her around. I slam my hands against the wheel. “God damnit! How could you? She was the best damn thing to ever happen to me.” She desereved better. I loved her. “I love you Annie.” I say this with a trembling voice. “I’m doing this for you. For the both of us.” I hope she can find peace with me leaving.

Rebecca

Love is a strange thing; A feeling if you will. It brings people together and tears others apart. It’s supposed to be something cherished but I’ve seen so many throw it away. Why? That’s the real question I want answered. I watched my mom and dad be completely in love then completely fall out of love but for the life of me I can’t figure out why. What makes someone fall so hard then leave it so quickly?

Johnny

Waking up around noon with a migrane and smell of perfume on my shirt lets me know I definitly had a good time last night. Sleep all day and part all night. What could make this better? Oh, I forgot. A girl that’ll actually stick around and do that with me. I need to find someone to settle down with. Rolling out of bed I reach for my phone. Six missed calls from Annie and a voicemail.

“Johnny please pick up. Dave left. I don’t know where he went,”

she’s crying so hard I can barely understand a word she’s saying, “If you can, come over please. I don’t know what to do.”

 

Shit. She’s probably scared as hell. I quickly slip on some jeans and a shirt, brush my teeth and run my fingers through my hair. Running for the truck I can’t help but worry she’s done something bad. “Hang on Annie. I’m coming for you.”

“Tis better to have loved and lost then to have never loved at all.”

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THAT RIGHT THERE IS A LOAD OF FRACKING BULL!

At least to me right now it is. I’m not even sure if I love this person or not. I mean, I know I like him. A LOT. But.. love? I don’t even know if it exist.

“If you love something, let it go. If it doesn’t come back then it was never yours to have.” (Pretty sure that’s how it goes)

He’s leaving and there’s nothing I can say or do that’s going to make him stay. I know I can’t be selfish and try to keep him here. He deserves better then to be stuck in this crappy state. Maybe.. he deserves better then me? I don’t know. I want to be the reason to make him stay. I want to be the one person who has the power of making him leave or stay. But I know I’m not that person. And I have to let him go. And it hurts. A lot. I don’t know what I’m going to do once he leaves, because once he’s gone.. he’s gone and that’ll be the end of whatever it was that we had. It’s almost like one of those tragic love stories you read about. It’s so predictable and you keep screaming at the girl that she’s going to get hurt but of course she goes off and falls in love with him and when it comes time for him to leave.. she convinces him to stay. Because he loves her too. But not in my tragic love story.

My story ends with him living a better life with someone new and better and me.. trying to find ways to cope with it. Me having to tell everyone I’m fine without him and that I’m strong. When really, all I do is hurt. That, is the ending to my beautiful yet tragic love story.